2008-05-06 Coco

11/19/1995 – 05/06/2008

The Vet advised we leave Coco on the floor instead of putting her up on the table.  I was glad to hear that as I was worried I would faint.  I sat with my back against the wall, Coco sitting between my legs leaning against my chest.  Not long after the needle was inserted, she slumped to the floor against Steve’s legs.  We rubbed and petted her until she was gone.  While sad and miserable, it was peaceful.

Upon leaving the Vet’s office, we were greeted on the sidewalk by a Chocolate Lab Puppy.

2008-05-06 Coco

It was a very rough night.  Every 90 minutes I was up cleaning up after Coco and changing her bedding.  That done, I would lay with her until she was settled at which point I crawled back in my own bed.  I doubt either of us got an hour of sleep.  She’s obviously uncomfortable.  Our appointment with the Vet isn’t until 5:45 this afternoon.  She seems to be done vomiting.  I don’t know how there could possibly be anything left in her stomach.  I’m giving her a bit of turkey dog or chicken and a tablespoon of the water every hour.  She’s exhausted, yet can’t seem to sleep.  Her eyes start to close and her head lowers to her legs, the arm of the couch, my legs and as soon as it rests she jerks it up and the process starts again.  She can still walk, though I haven’t a clue from where she’s getting the strength.

2008-05-05 Coco

I spoke with the Veterinary Neurologist at the University.  He figures 4 days to 40.  Not four months.  He feels it’s too late for an ultrasound.  He promised she will experience little pain.  Just weakness, confusion and disorientation.  Hopefully we can continue to keep her seizure free.  Tonight she’s having trouble keeping food down.  I’m feeding her one spoonful of Solid Gold’s Turkey, Ocean Fish, Carrots & Sweet Potatoes Canned Dog Food every half hour.  I don’t know what I’ll do overnight.  Or all day tomorrow.  She seems a bit restless/confused/nervous.  I’m glad I never got around to changing the Dogs’ bedding this weekend, as I would have ended up doing it again today.  Coco is vomiting more and more.  I called the University’s Veterinary ER.  There’s no treatment.  Just wait and see what happens.  I’m giving up on food.  Instead I’m putting Wholefood Farmacy’s Stardust 2 Hydr8 which is a blend of Baking Soda, Startudst Pure Salt & Sweet Leaf in her water.  I put this stuff in my water when I go to the gym or feel otherwise compromised from a hydration standpoint.  I will give her controlled access to this water for a bit and see what happens.  Google tells me Stevia is an herb that tastes sweet but is not sugar, so I’ve added a teaspoon of sugar to the water bowl.  Hanna won’t drink it.  It could be a long night.  I gave Coco her prednisone in sausage, half a turkey dog and a few slurps of water. 

2008-05-04 Coco

It is important to me that Coco die peacefully on a good day.  I will not have her terrorized by a seizure like she had Friday morning.  I will not have her experience pain.  It’s not important the quantity of days left, but the quality.  I’m amazed at how much confidence she regained being seizure free for just 24 hours.  She is on Prednisone every 12 hours.  Twice daily she gets ¼ of her chow every half hour. 

2008-05-02 Friday

It’s official.  Coco has Canine Insulinoma.  They give her 4-6 months.  I need to decide if I want to take her back for an untrasound to see just how much it’s spread.  Her blood work already indicates spread to the liver.  I’m inclined to not put her (or me) through that.  But, when I settle down in a few days I’m going to have an awful lot of questions about what to expect.  I have learned one thing recently:  There is something worse than taking her to the Vet and putting her on the table and that would be to have her die of a seizure in my bedroom.

For A Brown Dog

She’s proud and tall with warm, soft ears

She walks with purposed grace

Her cord like tail still makes a whap

On walls or Avery’s face

Her life force ebbs, her age is old

But muster on she will

Confused a bit by what besets her

Yet yearning for the thrill

Of another walk around the lake

Or a trot along the trail

A chance to roam and chew some grass

Or sniff another’s tail

Oh brown dog, you precede us

As your essence mists away

Yet knowing that it must be so

To follow you some day

If I believe that we are spirit

With taken human form

It’s not a reach to say the same

For a dog with ears so warm

2008-04-24 Thursday

This morning Coco went down and couldn’t get up.  Twice I lifted her up to a sitting position, but she couldn’t hold it.  I took some video, then repositioned her legs to what seemed to me to be a more comfortable position and sat with her until eventually she could get up on her own.  The spells always start just after she eats.  Out of curiosity, I fed her different chow this morning.  I’ve never suspected the chow for two reasons:  1.  Both dogs get a 50/50 mix of Solid Gold’s Hund-n-Flocken which is lamb and rice and Solid Gold’s WolfKing which is bison and salmon.  2.  Hanna eats the same chow and has no symptoms.  Starting this evening, I’m going to feed Coco Solid Gold’s Turkey, Ocean Fish, Carrots & Sweet Potatoes Canned Dog Food.  I’m curious if not chewing something so crunchy as hard chow makes any difference. 

2008-04-10 Thursday

Something is not right with Coco.  Her front or back feet keep collapsing, like she’s dizzy or something.  Steve watched Coco for a while and when I was done at the gym I went home to check on her.  She’s not had another episode.  She seems fine.  The Vet is double booked today, so I’ve made an appointment for tomorrow.  The camera will give me peace of mind while I’m at my office.